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angry

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It's not that I give a damn who she slept with or why or what she did. If the other side wanted to spy on us, and I'm sure that they do, they wouldn't make such an obvious choice.

But Reynard really fucking needs to stop looking at her that way because I am going to bloody kill him if he doesn't. She's thin, blonde, pale, perfect, wealthy, brilliant, and she's probably getting a decent job, while I'll have to stay here with the rest of the children. Maybe I shouldn't, but I really hate her right now.

I know he can't get her back, but that isn't the point. I never had any idea what Liane was supposed to have looked like; I always thought she looked like me, that he would have a type like most people do. Instead she looks like an advert for absinthe, except she's not green.

I can't stand her.

And I shouldn't be like this, because I'm not any better than she is. If Reynard knew some of the things that I did over the summer, he'd probably be just as furious as I am now. But that was different. Even if it shouldn't be.

I could kill her. Just by looking at her.

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worried

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It's been a banner week and it's not even over yet. Asher managed to burn every social credit he had on account of being my cousin and Alma's little brother before he even got off the Hogwarts Express. Apparently he either felt up Lucius Malfoy, touched his hair or somehow managed to do both at once. I would like to believe that Ash is too innocent to feel someone up, but Ash has always shown every sign of being queer as a bent sickle and weird as socks on a snake. Being queer isn't necessarily a social liability--it's just a matter of finding the right friends. Being queer and effeminate isn't even a social liability--Mulciber takes Housewitchery and gets away with it--but being queer, effeminate, and unforgivably weird? Ash is just not wealthy enough to be that eccentric. He's taken all of Uncle Maynard's insanity and put his own unique spin on it. I don't believe for a minute that he's another one like Lady Malfoy; he's just Asher. I could wish he'd picked someone else to feel up, though, and apparently we are going to have to have a talk with him about touching people and S-E-X, as he wrote on a wall somewhere--Kyteler and Dashwood caught him in the act. I want Alma's backing on that, but I'm awfully afraid that Ash may know more about S-E-X than she does.

(She is looking awfully poorly. Perhaps I'll offer her moon tea again, with the added information that even if you're not using it for contraception it will regularise the cycles. She'll need it if she's having anything to do with Rochford; he's all hands, except for where he's mouth and prick. I really feel for her on account of the rumours, but I do wonder, if they're engaged, why she doesn't want anyone to know. It's a strange alliance to be sure, but the secrecy is only going to make the speculation that much worse.)

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pleased

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I managed to acquire a very nice bottle of Irish firewhiskey this morning; it's barely been touched, and I acquired it just before Charis could put it in her box for Binns. That stuff is hard to get and will only get harder to get if things go as badly as the Ozzer thought they were going to. And they probably will, if the way that Alma's looking is any gauge.

I think it's eminently fair that I keep it seeing as I could have cost Ravenclaw another point (not to mention all the points that Binns is going to take from his students when he finds out how much they drink and how much pornography they read).

On to Runes, I suppose.

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pessimistic

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After spending the entire summer working with the Ozzer (and Dolohov) doing USEFUL things, today I get to go back to school.

Lucky me.

I wonder if Alma has developed a backbone. Endymion has, so the end of the world must be imminent. Perhaps Hadrian found it rooting around back there.

I wonder if Asher still steals Alma's night-gowns. God I hope not, he'll be crucified in the dorms.

I miss my job already.

Hopefully I won't have to talk to Uncle Maynard at the train station. The man is scary. This is the year I'm finally going to get Alma to break her shell. Because I've got to have something to do.